What is Black Love? Why is it important?

What is Black Love?

There’s something special about Black Love. As a Black British woman, I’m probably biased in this assertion, but it’s true.

It’s a term that means different things to different people, so there’s no one way of defining it.

At first, it can seem like a juxtaposition. Black is often associated with negativity and darkness, so it can seem like a stark contrast when placed together with love. But when you realise ‘Black’ refers to Black people, and you have positive associations with Black people, then it becomes two words that go together like bread and butter.

Below is a definition from an Essence article:

“For me black love is the ability to love your mate and be unapologetically black while celebrating black excellence.”

Anthony and Sheena, Essence, October 2020

For me, it is an equal partnership where both people support each other to grow as individuals and pursue dreams to build a long-lasting and fulfilling life together. 

The term can refer to any type of love between black people, whether that be familial or friendship, but predominantly it is used when discussing romantic relationships. 

Where did the term come from?

The #BlackLove started online as a way for people to share positive images of black couples that many felt were missing in mainstream media (BBC, August 2018).

I was first introduced to the term through the YouTube series Black Love where black married couples openly discuss the realities of their relationships. They speak about how they met, fell in love, their highs and lows and what keeps them together through it all. 

When it began, it was rare for Black people in healthy relationships to speak so honestly about their experiences. Yet actors/actresses, singers, comedians, basketball players, and many more spoke candidly about their marriages on the show. 

It’s inspiring to hear the stories of successful Black people who have still maintained their marriages. Usually, it seems like the relationship is sacrificed in the pursuit of success.

Why should we care about it?

So often, we are bombarded with the narrative of the Black single-parent household or dysfunctional Black couples, and while that is the reality for many people, it’s not the only truth. 

Many of us grew up in functional two-parent households and lived in communities where we regularly saw happily married Black people. 

This reality also deserves a spotlight to provide a positive depiction of Black couples that gives hope, particularly to those who may not see it often, that they too can have a healthy, loving relationship. 

It’s a way of challenging negative stereotypes in the media through the universal and relatable language of love. 

Is it a Western Concept? 

A Black person is not Black in Africa or the Caribbean; they are just a person. This is a sentiment shared by many people from the diaspora when visiting an African country. Race is not the distinguishing factor when you’re in a population of the same race. 

Likewise, love is not Black Love in Africa or the Caribbean either; it’s just love. It’s something people there see all the time, and it’s shown in their TV shows, movies and celebrity couples. 

Love becomes Black Love when Black people are a minority and when healthy Black relationships are underrepresented in the content we consume. That’s when it needs to be highlighted; to shine a light on what would otherwise be overlooked.

That’s not to say it’s completely absent. We have strong examples of real and fictional couples that showcase Black excellence.

Black British Love

Many of the examples of Black Love we grew up with in the UK came from America.

But as Black culture in the UK continues to grow and Black spaces and voices are established, we see more examples of Black British Love being celebrated. 

The Black Love section of this blog will highlight these examples that we see in the media, TV shows, soaps, music, podcasts and movies, in the UK and beyond. It will explore conversations around it while celebrating the beauty of it. 

What does Black Love mean to you? What is your favourite Black couple, real or fictional? Leave a comment below to share your thoughts.

Check Out:
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